Today I wanted to take a moment to reflect on my 19th birthday, which was this past weekend.
Although in quarantine, this was definitely the best birthday yet. :) I truly, truly praise God for the ways He’s so graciously blessed me with soooo many blessings (like you all)! Thank you all so so much for making the day so special for me! I truly did not think I could feel so loved. :) Thank you for reminding me of His love and grace for us.
I think this year, I also just realized how much God’s grown me in the past year. As my birthday started, I started my day in prayer, writing a letter to God just thanking him for every moment of my life so far, and praying for humility throughout my birthday and that every message someone sent me would remind me of God’s love for me and how He is so, so good.
Here’s part of what I wrote in the letter: “Thank you so much for these past 18 years. I’m so so beyond grateful. Help me to be present with you today God and just to be amazed and filled with wonder at all of the amazing blessings you’ve provided me with God. I pray that Your Spirit would lead me God and dwell within me to be loving, humble, and filled with peace and joy. God I truly thank you for how far I’ve come this past year (I can still remember turning 18 and turning more to fleshly pleasures) [*like fulfillment from people and food*]. I thank you for all the ways you’ve challenged me and grown me towards you God. I pray that I would continue to grow to honor You and into the disciple You called me to do [*be*]. I give this year, and every year, to you God… I pray for an open heart of humility and peace and joy on this day, that I would just be so grateful and filled with wonder at all the gifts You’ve given me Lord. I love you so so much God. Thank you Heavenly Father. Thank you. I praise You for these 18 years, every moment, every experience, every person You’ve brought into my life. I love you. Thank You. Thank You. Thank You… I love You so much, and no letter nor prayer will ever fully encapsulate just how Wonderful You are...”
I can’t remember starting past birthday’s in prayer, and it just made me so joyful to see how I’ve grown to keep my eyes on Him more and more. I wanted to start off the day and new year with Him—wow He’s helped me come so far.
I also confessed in this letter and to God how sinful I am and how much I need God. And I think, to be honest, I realized this more and more on my birthday too. Praise God! There’s a graphic that we learned at a Community Group meeting once in college (and that can be easily be found by searching up “the cross chart” on Google:)), that for us was from a guide called “The Gospel-Centered Life.” Here is the model:
Here's where I got this particular image^ (gotta cite ya sources ya know): http://applyingthegospel.com/am-i-getting-worse/
And here’s a post that I think explains aspects of the model pretty well (feel free to search up “the cross chart” on Google and read more/see what you find too!:)). Note: This post’s graphic is a little different because it’s talking about how we often shrink the cross (sad): https://thegospelcenteredlife.com/2012/02/28/shrinking-the-cross/
In the “The Gospel-Centered Life” guide we read, it talks about how this model is a helpful way to think of “the gospel and its implications.” Basically, after conversion, as we continue to grow in Christ, we become more aware of His holiness and our sinful nature (He's always been unimaginably Holy, and it's not that we're like getting more sinful... but our awareness increases). And I think, on my birthday, this was the case as well. :) I was constantly reminded of how He’s graciously blessed me and how wonderful and good He is, but also of ways I continue to sin and turn to other things for fulfillment. So I praise God for continual realizations and convictions and that we can repent and turn to Him.
Finally, recently at a Senior Night for our College Fellowship our Pastor opened us up in prayer, and said that may we celebrate our seniors while ultimately remembering it is a night in celebration of God. I loved how he put it and realized how true it is. And so, I really praise God that I could ultimately celebrate Him more and more on my birthday. Praise God for life (literally and spiritually which is also literally haha) and who He is!
All for the glory of God.
With love,
Joyce
Bible verse foundation: “Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; His love endures forever.” 1 Chronicles 16:34
P.S. Thank you all so much again. I truly truly mean it wow thank YOU ALL! :’) PRAISE THE LORD! :)))
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